Sunday, November 27, 2022

Pinky Ruth #76

I am home from my holiday adventure at Lay-dee's house. I am disappointed to report that, although I did smell it, there was not one scrap of turkey offered to me.

I have started to greet Lay-dee by prancing up to her and meowing my happy, friendly meows every time she comes upstairs. Lay-dee then attacks me with hugs and scratches on the top of my head. She tells me she loves me and tells me how pretty I am. I am not sure I have decided to love Lay-dee back and I have definitely not decided if she is also pretty, but I do love that junk cat food she feeds those hooligans. It is much tastier than my healthy kidney diet food. I now know that if I treat Lay-dee real nice, she will sneak me a few pieces of that forbidden food when Maddie is not looking.
During my holiday adventure at Lay-dee's, I was called to supervise Maddie and that booming-voiced man-boy. They were playing a game about birds and I felt they needed an expert close by. I sometimes like to hide from the hooligans under the man-boy's bed-but he was in it every time I looked and the hooligans were not a threat. So, I stayed away.
Lay-dee drove Maddie and me back to the city today. The car was stopped at a light when a little girl in a giant tall car next to us looked down and saw me. She became very excited and told her family about me. Maddie raised my paw and waved to her. As she waved back, I could tell she was very happy--as she should have been.
Lay-dee had to stop the car for quite a long time. Maddie said there were other cars that had smashed into each other. I hate it when Lay-dee's car moves, so I didn't complain too much when it stopped. In fact, I couldn't stop staring at the blinking and flashing and twirling police car lights. Moving lights are my favorite. And now, police car lights are also my favorite.
I am home from my holiday adventure now. I have checked out the action from my 5th-floor perch and am now burrowed under Maddie's blankets, resigned to my upcoming dinner of kidney-friendly food.

Friday, November 25, 2022

Pinky Ruth #75

I chatter yelled at the crow through the car window. "Hey! I'm Pinky Ruth from the city! I know some city crows. Are you related to them?" The distracted suburban crow never looked my way. They just kept eating a french fry from the Dairy Queen.

This visit to Lay-dee's house has been almost relaxing. It is because Maddie did not dump me here and run off on some adventure. We are still able to cuddle every night.
I have also easily exerted my dominance over Lay-dee's elderly rascal hooligan cats. I have eaten their junk cat food, I have peed in their litter box, and I have watched birds from their favorite window perch. I even wandered downstairs into their territory and was completely unopposed.
The delightful realization that I might now be the feline sovereign of Lay-dee's house quickly turned to a bit of concern. Why does the black hooligan look so sad and old? Why does the other crazy hooligan look so skinny? What has happened to my hooligan adversaries?

Tuesday, November 22, 2022

Pinky Ruth #74

Things have become quite serious here on the 5th floor. I now know without a doubt that my city time is limited.

Maddie cleaned out the refrigerator.
My shocked face should be interpreted as the inevitable sad realization of my impending unrequested travel arrangements. I had prepared myself for a night of sulking. I was prepared to withhold 1% of my bedtime cuddles with Maddie in protest.
But then, the light arrived.
I chased it.
I attacked it.

Maddie said I was chasing my own shadow. They are so funny with the jokes.
I have hopes that perhaps, maybe, today is the day that I have finally vanquished this bright, repetitive, and persistent adversary.
As for Lay-dee's house? My reflective distraction has caused me to reevaluate my priorities. I have decided that Lay-dee must be relegated to a tomorrow problem.
Tonight, I cuddle with Maddie. (100%)

Monday, November 21, 2022

Pinky Ruth #73

Maddie said, "Lay-dee is excited to see you this week, Pinky Ruth! Lay-dee wants to know what you are doing right now."
The disgusted look on my face reflects the fact that I was suddenly woken by the phrase, "Lay-dee wants a picture of you."
I then laid my head down in the standard semi-serious feline depressive pose. As I anticipate my inevitable "holiday at Lay-dee's" adventure, I wish for 3 things.


1. I want to find that softy Bob the Builder blanket spread out on the end of Maddie's bed.
2. I want my closet fort to be repaired so that it will not collapse on me and try to kill me.
3. I want Lay-dee's rascal hooligan cats to respect the Pinky Ruth. Lay-dee's elderly kittymen need to keep their visits to an amicable, respectful sniffing session in my room. And then, they need to leave.
That is all the suburban hooligan friendship I anticipate needing.
Ever.
Signed, Pinky Ruth

#nophotosplease #bobthebuilderrocks #nohooligansallowed #friendshipisoverrated 

Friday, November 18, 2022

Pinky Ruth #72

Judging the events that occur below my 5th-floor viewing perch is one of the most important parts of my day. There are crows pecking in the dirt at the lot next door. There are busses stopping and going-people on, people off. There are bikes and cars and dogs. The dogs are constantly told they are "good dogs" because they wait outside the coffee shop until their neglectful owner returns. Maddie would never leave me alone outside of a coffee shop.

Last week I even saw teenagers from the high school walking with signs. They shouted that they wanted to learn without getting shot. Today, I found a bug in my viewing window. I chased it for 5 minutes before I killed it and left it for Maddie to dispose of.
You can see from this photo that my very important judging perch is being encroached upon by Maddie's plant obsession. Today, I maybe, "accidentally" nudged a plant. I needed more space and wanted a better view.
Maddie said, "Oh, Pinky Ruth, next week you'll have so many plant-free windows to look out of at Lay-dee's house."
My own plant-crowded window perch>>>10 of Lay-dee's plant-free windows
I withdraw my complaint.